Sex in Long Term Relationships

Are you getting enough? Let’s be honest, there’s a general belief (and truth?) that sex in long term relationships becomes sparse. But why is that?

Is it a time thing? We discuss #schedule vs #spontaneity… we’re just being real ladies.

What about quality vs quantity? Do you agree that there is always time for a quickie or do you want to be schmoooozzzzeeed?

And how about the boredom factor. Let’s face it, we’ve done it with each other a lot. We kinda know what’s about to happen. So how can we bring that excitement back? A few things we talked about were #warmmeup #dontfart #washyourfeet.

It’s all about thinking about the IMPACT of your actions or non-actions on your partner. Are his smelly feet the equivalent of you not shaving your legs in the winter? Does he want you to greet him 1950’s style when he gets in from work but you’re a #nagginghag because you’ve had a long day.

Ultimately, if your relationship is important to you, in this session we want to talk to you about #doitforus – i.e. this is about the pair of you and what can change for you and not just YOU having more sex.

This weeks #redshoeaction is….. we want to know what you are going to do to hot up your sex life. Whether that means more of it or just better quality, come share your what you are committing to over on our Facebook page, YouTube or even on your social media channels and spread the love for Red Shoe Lounge!


Why you MUST have resilience

For the purpose of this podcast, our definition of resilience is the ability to be able to continue with courage even when you are struggling with external situations.

Today, Mara and I talk honestly about what do we do we find ourselves in the “darkness”. This is deeper than just wanting to “throw in the towel”. It’s those times when something external happens, outside of your control, and ALL you can do is decide how you are going to get through it.

Mara talks about how she struggled with allowing herself to “just fucking feel it” because she knew that suppression only leads to dis-ease and she had to learn to be #studentofthesuck.

And how do you deal with well-meaning friends who really DON’T know you’re feeling?How do you have to improve yourself in order to work through it? What do you need to do or think so you can CHOOSE to move forward?

#RedShoeAction this week. Please reach out to someone if you need help. You are not alone and someone is waiting to help you. Also, tell us what you do for YOUR friends when you know they’re struggling?


Suck it up And Get up

Whether it’s The Miracle Morning, The 5am Club, The Slight Edge or High Performance Habits – there are a growing number of books telling us about the power of getting out of bed earlier.

“Snooze the alarm, snooze your life”

is a saying that Mara heard that instigated her 5am starts in September in 2018 and her life has changed SO much because of this one (not so simple) ritual.

I more recently switched my 6am start to 5am and I am LOVING what this gives me. I get some real quiet time by myself before the sun (and my family) get up. I get thinking time, yoga time and a delectable first coffee of the day. In silence. And it gets better. I am SO much more productive and I no longer feel like I’m chasing my day.

Now, if like Mara and I used to, you have a love affair with your mattress and the snooze button, then we’d like to offer some different perceptions about why you absolutely MUST start getting yourself up out of bed earlier in the morning.

If you were truly excited about your life and what you could achieve, attain and experience today, you wouldn’t even need an alarm, let alone a snooze button.

As always, we’d love your feedback so please drop your #redshoeaction in the comments, on our YouTube Channel or on our Facebook page, Red Shoe Lounge.


What are you willing to give up?

Are you living or existing?

There’s a clear difference and our question to you today is, what are you willing to give up so that you are living MORE and existing LESS.

And we want to make something super clear here – it doesn’t have to be a huge thing. There is an incredible book called, The Slight Edge, and it’s message is that….

It is the small, seemingly inconsequential actions done every day, that create the successful life

How different would your health and body be if you ate less carbs at each meal and moved more every day?

What would happen to your relationships if you put your phones/laptops away after 6pm and scheduled specific family time?

What would your love life look like if you told your partner one reason why you were grateful to them, every single day? (instead of reminding them what they DIDN’T do?)

This weeks #redshoeaction is to make a list of all the things you could give up, that over time would made a better life for you. Next, we want you to make a list of things you could START doing instead. Remember, drop your answers in the comments or share on social media with #redshoeaction.

What to do when you want to throw in the towel

Yes, really, it is as simple as pulling up this big girl pants and carrying on regardless

Stats tell us that 80% of people will have quit their New Year Resolutions by the 2nd week of February. Is that you? Do you find yourself constantly stopping and starting? “I’ll start again on Monday”… “I’ll start when…..”

Depressing isn’t it? And the more you do it, the more p*ssed off you get with it. And worse than that, every time to you stop, you are actually taking another step backward!

So what do we do about it? I’d love to say that there is a “secret” to this but honestly, there isn’t. It really is about pulling up the big girl pants. Stop waiting for easy. Make it important. Give up quitting.

If you are tired of starting over, stop quitting….

I find a big problem with my coaching clients is that they don’t know either a. what specifically to work on or b. they’re really not attached to the consequence of what happens if they don’t make the change.

In this episode, Mara and I give you our best advice on always moving forward, even when it feels TOUGH.

#redshoeaction this week is identifying WHY you are where you are and deciding on what action you can take to move the needle forward.

EVERYTHING is easier said than done!

Making your success your PRIORITY in 2019

Making your purpose, living your best life, is about as fantastic as it gets!

Now more than ever, the world needs more people to live their best life. Why? Because living your best life means being your best self and THAT has a global impact.

Do you know the story of the monk who was “placed” to live in an area of the U.S. with notoriously high crime rates? Now I can’t remember where I read this or the stats but the gist of the story is that by simply having his energy in that town, dramatically reduced the crime rate. It is suggested it was the impact of his Energy and his Intention and if you do a quick google search, you will find lots of scientific evidence to support this.Now, whilst my mission to live my best life is intrinsically linked to helping save Mother Earth, it’s totally ok for you to just want to feel totally happy, fulfilled and high on life. And in this episode, Mara and I tell you WHY this is so important and how you can go about doing that.

#redshoeaction this week gives you a simple exercise to carry out where you can identify your “GAP” and start to thinking about what will bridge it and take you to a life that looks and feels much better to you.

Remember, share your #redshoeaction on social media either on our YouTube channel or Facebook page so we can see what you’re up to.

How do you want to FEEL in 2019?

What your vibratin’ you’re creatin’

In our first ever episode of the Red Shoe Lounge, Mara and I want to talk to you about whether your goals and resolutions match up to how you want to feel!

You see, what a lot of people don’t realise is that every time we set a goal, we are actually looking to feel a feeling. That money goal you have – maybe want you really want is to feel FREE? The super car? Perhaps that makes you feel alive? The smaller dress size? Are you trying to feel young and sexy again?

So today we want to help you understand how you can start to identify WHY you want what you want and HOW you can create the vibration to help make that happen.

We always appreciate your feedback, so please do feel free to leave a comment and please, do share this episode with your friends.